Knowing all the theory while nothing actually changes
To
Noticing what you are feeling as it happens, and responding differently, because you have practised it physically and not only read about it.
4 month program
Toxic Family Survival School
Students consistently report accomplishing more in four months of TFSS than 10 to 20 years and $100,000 to $200,000 of therapy.
A 4 month somatic neural repatterning lab for adult children of narcissistic, emotionally immature and authoritarian parents. Learn by doing, with the leader in the neuroscience of narcissistic abuse and childhood trauma.
Apply nowKeep scrolling to see everything that's included
What This Group Helps You Rewire
To
Anxiety, hypervigilance, chronic stress and overwhelm
To
Riding the waves of anxiety in a healthier way, and using your bodily signals and emotions as messengers for what needs to change in your life, so your anxiety naturally softens and takes over far less.
Low self-worth, never feeling good enough, a harsh inner critic
To
Feeling safe and secure with yourself, without needing achievement or approval to prove it.
Boundary problems, not being able to say no, paralysing guilt
To
Saying no in one sentence and not taking it back, without a five day guilt and shame spiral afterward.
People-pleasing, fawning, self-abandoning
To
Noticing it in your body the moment it starts, and being able to balance what you want and need with the wants and needs of other people, in a healthy way.
A lost sense of self, not knowing who you are underneath the conditioning
To
Knowing who you are, through a real connection to your body and the experience of being seen by safe people.
Feeling stuck and spinning despite years of work
To
Actual movement, after years of understanding your history without anything changing.
Decades of talk therapy that has not been enough
To
Change you can feel, because the work is physical as well as verbal.
Chronic unresolved anger that you can't quite figure out
To
Awakened, aware anger that supports your vitality and your boundaries, rather than running the show.
Depression, numbness, not being able to access your feelings
To
Feeling connected to the full breadth of your human experience, and registering the things you enjoy.
Freezing, shutting down or dissociating during and after family contact
To
Staying present and able to speak, even in the moments that used to shut you down completely.
Worrying you are passing this on to your own children
To
Being the regulated one in your family, so your children co-regulate with you instead of learning what you had to learn. You are the ultimate cycle breaker.
Attracting narcissists, avoidants and emotionally unavailable people, and being afraid to be vulnerable because it was always used against you
To
Recognising it early, and being open to healthy love and connection, because you have had the experience of being seen by healthy people instead of chronically abandoned by unavailable ones.
Shame, embarrassment, feeling broken or defective
To
I'm wounded and healing, instead of I'm bad and there's something wrong with me. Healing shame is the linchpin of the whole thing.
What You'll Learn and Practice
You'll gain tools to:
- Reparent yourself and reach your inner child through felt practice rather than storytelling, so the parts of you that had to survive your childhood finally get what they needed
- Heal your nervous system from chronic dysregulation (fight, flight, freeze, fawn) to a state of safety, presence, and self-trust
- Recognize and rewire internalized beliefs that came from living with manipulation, criticism, emotional enmeshment, or neglect and so much more.
- Release stored trauma on a somatic and molecular level, through interoceptive, body-based methods
- Reclaim your sense of self beyond the role you had to play in your family of origin
We work in three domains
Your relationship to yourself, your relationship to your body and emotions, and your relationship to others.
Your relationship to yourself
Stop scanning for what you did wrong every time someone goes quiet
Trust your own memory when they tell you it didn't happen that way
Say what you need out loud without apologising for it
Like the person you are when nobody is watching
Your relationship to your body and emotions
Feel calm in your body instead of braced for something you can't name
Rest without guilt, and without crashing the second you stop
Stop swinging between rage at them and guilt about the rage
Feel something without either shutting down or detonating
A whole brain and body approach. I am a psychoneuroimmunologist, which means I study how chronic stress and trauma change the immune system, inflammation and hormones. So when I say molecular, I mean it literally.
You learn how chronic stress raises your cortisol and stress hormones, and how changing your daily behaviour lowers them and supports your body from the cellular level up.
This matters because so many people with complex trauma also live with chronic illness, autoimmune conditions, fibromyalgia and chronic pain.
This is the only program that combines nervous system healing with the behavioural medicine of psychoneuroimmunology and the real physical damage that narcissistic and dysfunctional parents cause. Nothing else like it exists.
Your relationship to others
Say no without spending the next three days justifying it
Stop ending up with the same unavailable partner in a different body
See your parent and not unravel for a week afterward
Know who is safe before you have already told them everything
Stop waiting for the apology that was never coming
Finish a hard conversation and stop thinking about it
If you grew up in a narcissistic, dysfunctional, substance abusing, emotionally immature, or authoritarian family, you were shaped by intense relational environments from an early age.
You adapted and had to abandon yourself in order to survive.
This is where you finally get the framework, the language, and the support you should have had from the beginning.
This is an immersive, skills-based nervous system and relational training. Deep, structured, and transformative, while still being highly supportive.
As a neuroscientist, trauma-informed coach, and licensed therapist, I help adult children of narcissistic or emotionally neglectful parents understand and rewire the impact of trauma at the level of the brain, body, and immune system.
Adult children of narcissistic parents carry invisible but deeply embedded imprints from chronic emotional abuse, neglect, and relational trauma.
Are you ready to rewire your brain and body, release old trauma patterns, and build a life rooted in resilience, regulation, and meaningful connection?
What makes this program different?
This is the only program of its kind. It combines nervous system healing with the behavioural medicine of psychoneuroimmunology and the specific physical damage that narcissistic and dysfunctional parents cause. That combination does not exist anywhere else in the complex trauma space.
Why this works
Research that has not reached most practitioners yet
I am a clinical and molecular neuroscientist and a licensed therapist. One area of my research is cPTSD. I also specialise in psychoneuroimmunology, which was a major focus of my degree: how chronic stress and trauma affect the immune system, inflammation and hormones.
cPTSD is not a diagnosis in the United States. It is not in the DSM, so there is officially nothing to train therapists on.
The psychological and medical systems are siloed from each other, and inside the medical system the siloing is even worse. So you get treated for anxiety, or depression, or a relationship problem, one symptom at a time, by someone doing their best with the wrong map.
I work at the forefront of that research. What you learn here is what the evidence supports now, in plain language you can actually use.
The Science-Backed Process
Every live call is shaped around the people on it. You watch the recorded lectures between calls, so you already have the ideas and we spend the live time on the work itself.
You'll learn:
- Reparenting and inner child work you can feel rather than talk about. The parts of you that had to survive manipulation, abuse, enmeshment or neglect are met properly, often for the first time.
- Practices that start with the body so you are not stuck in survival mode, and a felt sense of safety is available to you no matter what happens.
- Change at the level of belief and reaction. What you assume about yourself changes, and so does how you react in the moment with your parent, your partner or your boss.
- A whole brain and body approach. I am a psychoneuroimmunologist, so when I say molecular I mean it literally. You learn how chronic stress raises your cortisol and stress hormones, and how bringing those down through your daily behaviour supports your body from the cellular level up.
The live calls
What happens on a call
Two hours, three times a month. There are two parts to each call.
Q&A with me
Ask me directly about anything from the material or from your week.
Live demos
Do your own work with me, one to one, while the group watches. We usually have time for one or two demos per call. This is the part you cannot get from a recording.
You also learn from watching other people's demos. Someone brings a situation you can relate to, and you recognise your own pattern in it. Students describe the demos as life changing.
Coaching Curriculum
Twelve weeks of pre-recorded content. Live calls on the first three Tuesdays of every month, two hours each, with the remaining weeks as integration time to catch up on anything you missed and let your nervous system settle.
Month 1 · Month 1 · Month 1 · Month 1 · Month 1 · Month 1 · Month 1 · Month 1
Month 1: How You Were Left
This month is about getting your nervous system out of survival and into safety. You start learning to notice what is happening inside your own body.
What we'll cover:
- Understanding developmental deficitsWhat you needed as a child and did not get, and how that shaped the adult you became. Attunement, mirroring, emotional safety. You'll finally have language for it.
- Creating safety in the bodyInsight does not do much while your system is braced. You'll learn practical techniques to come down out of fight, flight and freeze, and you'll be able to use them anywhere.
- Healing from freeze and numbnessFoggy, shut down and flat is protection. We thaw it slowly, on your terms, and feeling comes back without flooding you.
- Assess your parent clearlyLearn the difference between emotional immaturity and narcissism, so you stop guessing whether it was bad enough, and stop expecting things from people who cannot give them.
- Recognise the covert narcissistic parentThe one almost nobody talks about, and the hardest to name because it never looked like abuse from the outside.
- Trace your shame to its sourceFind the exact moments that manufactured it, and the real origin of your codependency.
- See the bigger pictureRead your ACE score and understand what it means for your health. Understand the systems that produced your family. Recognise the structural overlap between narcissistic families, high control religion, cults and domestic violence.
- Understand why your parent will never changeAt the level of their psychology, so you can stop waiting.
- Turn some of that empathy inwardYou can read everyone around you. We point some of that skill back at you.
Month 2 · Month 2 · Month 2 · Month 2 · Month 2 · Month 2 · Month 2 · Month 2
Month 2: How You Leave Yourself
This month is about integration. You'll see how your system took on the dysfunction, then rewire those patterns with something that actually works for you.
What we'll cover:
- Reparenting through the bodyNot storytelling about your inner child. Felt practice that calms the stress response and gives you something you can use again and again.
- Catch self-abandonment as it happensPeople pleasing is not a character flaw. You'll learn your own physical signature for it, so you feel it starting instead of finding out three days later.
- Know which survival response is runningAll four of them, in your own system, in real time.
- Become gaslight-proof, including by yourselfRebuild trust in your own memory and your own read on a situation, so it holds up under pressure.
- Set boundaries without explaining yourselfThe work happens in your body first. The sentence is the easy part. You say the thing, then you go on with your day, with no guilt spiral afterward.
- Release chronic stress and overwhelmLong-term stress affects your gut, your sleep and your energy. You'll learn body-based techniques to unwind it and start feeling like yourself again.
- Work with freeze instead of waiting it outAnd reclaim anger as a resource instead of a threat.
- Speak the language of your own bodyUnderstand your inner world and your core self.
- Understand why insight alone never changed anythingThe difference between top down, bottom up and horizontal communication and integration of the brain. Where CPTSD and PTSD differ. Where EMDR and other modalities fit and where they do not.
- Spot bypassing in yourself and othersIncluding how therapy and self-help language became another way to override yourself, and how you use substances, busyness and fixing to avoid what you feel. This is one of the key skills for healing these patterns sustainably.
- Know what genuinely resources youAnd separate your own voice from the ones you took in that were never yours.
- Handle emotionally immature peopleCommunicate with people who will never grow up. Respond when they twist your words, deny what happened, or make themselves the victim. Stop waiting for an apology that was never coming.
- Say the hard thing and stay steadyTo your partner, sibling or friend, without collapsing or going cold. Finish a conversation without replaying it for three days. Stop swinging between rage and guilt.
Month 3 · Month 3 · Month 3 · Month 3 · Month 3 · Month 3 · Month 3 · Month 3
Month 3: Come Home to Yourself
This month heals your relationship with yourself. You develop resilience and real emotional presence, and grow capacity instead of coping skills.
What we'll cover:
- Rebuild self-esteem from the ground upEarly neglect and shame wrote your beliefs about yourself before you could argue back. This is where those get rewritten, in your body as well as your head.
- Heal shame at the rootThe shift from I'm bad and there's something wrong with me, to I'm wounded and healing. This is the linchpin of the whole thing.
- Worth that is not performanceIf you were praised for what you produced and not for existing, you may feel like a human doing. This is where you reconnect with worth that does not have to be earned.
- Grieve the lost childhoodAnd the parts of you nobody has ever loved. Fully felt and processed, not bypassed.
- Know who is safe before you get hurtYour body already knows, ahead of your mind. You'll learn to hear it in time, and read green and red flags as they happen.
- Feel better physicallyGut issues, fatigue, inflammation and brain fog are part of this picture. You'll understand what is driving them and how food and rest support the rest of the work.
- Speak up without losing your footingSay the true thing in a way that keeps you regulated and keeps the conversation survivable.
- Learn what rest feels likeWhen hypervigilance has been normal, rest is a skill you develop. You'll rest without guilt and without crashing afterward.
- Want things againAnd a resourcing plan you can use, not just a feeling.
- Live with flexibilityA regulated system is not a calm one, it is an adaptable one, so you can meet whatever happens without collapsing or detonating.
- Recognise emotional adulthoodHaving never been shown it. Understand emotional availability and what it requires, make space for incongruency in yourself and other people, and change all three roles codependency locks you into.
Real student results
What people say about this program
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Here's how it works
| Content | Twelve weeks of pre-recorded content |
|---|---|
| Live calls | First three Tuesdays of every month, two hours each, 08:00 to 10:00 PT, 11:00 to 13:00 ET, 16:00 to 18:00 UK |
| On the calls | Q&A with me, plus one or two live demos where you do your own work with me one to one and learn from watching others |
| Monday calls | Three Mondays a month at 18:00 UK. Somatic Sadhana on the first and third Monday, yoga nidra or trauma-informed yoga on the second |
| On-demand library | Hundreds of trauma-informed somatic practices, available 24/7 from the moment you are granted access |
| Integration weeks | The remaining weeks of each month have no call, so you can catch up on anything you missed and let your nervous system settle |
| Live calls and community | Four months, plus two extra months of live coaching when you enroll now |
| Pre-recorded materials | Access for twelve months from your date of purchase |
| After that | Graduates can continue in the community through a monthly membership. Spots are limited. |
| What this is | While I am a licensed therapist, this is NOT mental health treatment or therapy and does not replace therapy or medical treatment. |
This is for you if
- You were raised by a narcissistic, neglectful, authoritarian or emotionally immature parent
- You have done therapy and understand your history, and it has not changed how you feel
- You want the work in your body, not just in your head
- You are willing to show up for four months
This is not for you if
- You are looking for crisis support
- You are using recreational substances regularly, including cannabis and alcohol, and you cannot stop or reduce your usage
- You have been diagnosed with BPD or NPD
- You are actively suicidal
- You do not believe in science or evidence-based research
- You are not willing to support diversity and the full spectrum of human differences and individual identities
Also included
Your weekly Monday calls: Somatic Sadhana
When you enroll, you also get three Monday calls every month at 18:00 UK.
Sadhana means the daily, disciplined practice you do to develop inner resilience and awareness. Somatic Sadhana combines nervous system practice with readings from spiritual and psychological texts, so you can:
- Feel like yourself instead of constantly bracing or being on edge
- Learn to regulate without spiraling
- Trust your own perceptions (and become gaslight-proof)
- Stay grounded during conflict
- Stop overfunctioning to keep the peace
- Heal the patterns you learned in a toxic or emotionally immature family
Somatic Sadhana runs on the first and third Monday of each month. The second Monday is yoga nidra or trauma-informed yoga.
You also get access to hundreds of trauma-informed somatic practices you can do any time, 24/7, from the moment you are granted access to the program.
Enroll now
Two extra months of live coaching
When you enroll now, you get two extra months of live coaching on top of the four. Six months of live calls and community instead of four.
Here's how to join
Step 1: Apply
The application takes about five minutes. It asks what you want to change and what has been difficult. Everything you need to know about the program is inside, including payment options.
Step 2: Book a call
We get on a call together. This is where we make sure it is a good fit, both ways. You ask me anything you want, and I make sure I can genuinely help you before either of us commits.
FAQs
How is this different from all the other programs that claim to heal my nervous system?
This is the only program of its kind. It combines nervous system healing with the behavioural medicine of psychoneuroimmunology and the specific physical damage that narcissistic and dysfunctional parents cause. That combination does not exist anywhere else in the complex trauma space.
Most of these programs are led by a coach or therapist whose training amounts to a weekend course or two, with no clinical experience working with dysfunctional families, no background in wilderness therapy, and no formal education in neuroscience. I am a licensed therapist and a molecular neuroscientist researching cPTSD and psychoneuroimmunology, which is how chronic stress and trauma change the immune system, inflammation and hormones.
I am a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner and an advanced assistant for the Somatic Experiencing Institute, a NARM Master Level therapist, and trained in Brainspotting, EMDR and clinical hypnosis for trauma and PTSD. NARM, the NeuroAffective Relational Model, is an approach built for complex developmental and relational trauma and the deep character adaptations that come with it. Wilderness therapy is one of the most rigorous treatment modalities and milieus that exists. The work is extreme, both because of the harsh physical environment and because the clients and families were severely psychologically unwell. As a wilderness therapist, our clinical outcomes ran about 30 percent above the industry average. So you get the research and the clinical skill in the same room.
I also have personal, lived experience with everything I teach. I have done extensive personal work so that I can hold a container for other people's work, because I have walked this path myself and I continue to walk it. My own personal work is one of the most fulfilling areas of my life and my deepest commitment to myself in this lifetime.
The other difference is what happens on the calls. This is not lecture after lecture. You watch the teaching on your own time, and the live calls are spent doing the actual work, including one to one demos with me while the group watches. Most programs never give you that.
You can read my full training and credentials here.
Can I sit in on a group call before I join?
Group calls are closed. Members sign a confidentiality agreement before they get access, and everyone on the call has been vetted.
Many members have emotionally immature family who would like to know what is being said about them. I am not going to let an unvetted stranger watch someone's private work, and I am not going to put you on a call where that happens either.
You would not expect to observe a private group therapy session before signing up for one, and the same principle applies here. This is coaching rather than therapy, and people share things on these calls they have not said anywhere else, because the group is protected.
To see how I teach and work with a group, come to one of my free live workshops.
What's the call schedule?
The program includes a combination of pre-recorded content and live group calls.
Pre-recorded content will be released over 12 weeks. Live calls run on the first three Tuesdays of every month, two hours each. Each call is Q&A with me plus one or two live demos, where you can do your own work with me one to one while the group watches.
The remaining weeks of the month are integration time, with no call, so you can catch up on anything you missed and let your nervous system settle. Depending on the month that is one or two weeks.
Live calls are scheduled on Tuesdays from 08:00 to 10:00 PT / 11:00 to 13:00 ET / 16:00 to 18:00 BT.
How long will I have access to the recorded content?
You have access to the live calls and community for four months, plus two extra months of live coaching when you enroll now, so six months in total.
The pre-recorded materials are yours to access for twelve months from your date of purchase.
What if I want to continue attending live calls after my 4 month period?
Graduates of the program are invited to continue inside the community through a monthly membership. This membership includes ongoing access to the live calls and continued support within the community. Please note that availability is limited and is subject to open spots, to maintain the integrity of the space.
Is this therapy or group coaching?
While I am a licensed therapist, this is NOT mental health treatment or therapy and does not replace therapy or medical treatment.
What's the cancellation policy?
Payment options, including installment plans, are covered in the application.
If you decide to pay in installments, you authorize us to charge your card in the amounts listed in your application, charged one month apart. Monthly payments are processed on the same calendar date you enroll. Please ensure this date works for you, as payment dates cannot be changed once the plan is active.
If your credit card expires or fails to authorize payments, you agree to provide a new payment method. If you do not provide a new payment method, you agree to no longer participate in the group or use the course materials. You are still responsible for the entire cost of the course.
LATE PAYMENTS If a fee balance has not been paid for 30 days, you agree to payment of a late-payment fee of 3% of the total overdue amount, to be charged monthly (and prorated for periods of less than one month). You might not be allowed to participate in your group until your balance has been paid. We also reserve the right to use a credit card on file to make payment on past due invoices. If your account becomes seriously delinquent, we will have no choice but to resort to collection proceedings, and you agree to be responsible for our attorney's fees and costs incurred in those proceedings. If your card fails, you are still responsible for the full cost of the course.
REFUNDS There are no refunds. If I do not think you are a good clinical fit, I will not enroll you in the first place.
CONDUCT If you behave in an abusive way toward me, my team, or another member of the group, you will be removed without a refund. You remain responsible for the remainder of your payment plan.
Upon joining, you commit to the full payment of the group. You are responsible for all months of fees regardless of your continued participation, how engaged you are, your attendance, utilization of the materials, or the results achieved.
